this and that

Adam is learning how to ride his bike!

 and he finally let me give him another hair cut without having to use the scissors the whole time.

 we got mango in our bountiful basket and mad sweet rice and mango. yum.

 Signing a birthday card for Great grandma (my niece Tailly was born on may 5th)

Pineapple cheesecake 

On Loss

Due to circumstances beyond my control, recently I have been reflecting on things of a spiritual nature. I apologize in advance if this post is a little too serious, I don't think it can really be helped. The outpouring of love, friendship, and support has been amazing and leaves me feeling so very blessed. I've had so many thoughts and emotions running through my head and I really need to be able to sort them all out, so here it goes.  Last week I lost my baby.  I don't know what else I can or should say. Words seem inadequate.
 Miscarriage is a much gentler word for it than they use in the medical field. Abortion is so prevalent in the world today  and it makes me wonder and feel very sorry for any woman who would choose to do that to her own baby and her own body. I wasn't even ten weeks along and yes, I lost my baby... not just a fetus, not random tissue but a baby. My baby. And my baby was loved and very wanted.
This last week has not been easy, but I am doing okay.  I know there was nothing I did wrong or nothing I could have done better to keep this little one.  There were problems from the beginning and I think I knew it was coming, one hint was that I was never sick.  When I saw my baby on the ultrasound I knew, it was just too small and the tiny heart had stopped, but almost in the moment I knew, along with the sadness and feeling of loss, I felt hope and peace.  I know that my Father in Heaven keeps his promises.  I know that when I put my faith and trust in him, he will support me through all my trials and troubles and afflictions (Alma 36:3).  This doesn't mean that everything is perfect, I am relieved that readers can't tell how often I have to stop to get some control over my emotions, but it does mean that I am letting my Savior help me through this. He has sent so many wonderful people into my life; friends, neighbors, and especially family.  My husband has been my rock and our parents have been wonderful, even my boys have been helping out in their own little way. I am very blessed. While I will continue to grieve for our loss I am filled with peace and hope for the future.  There will be more babies and they too will be loved and wanted.  I pray that those of you who have helped and showed care and concern for my family will know how thankful I am for you. Thank you with all my heart.

April Showers

More like April snow storms, but there has been a good amount of rain mixed in there too. :)  we have been having fun inside and Kyle finally got crawling down.  in the video he is going pretty slow but that was a few days ago. Now he is super speedy, and a lot less needy when it comes to separation anxiety.  Which is a plus for all concerned.  On Saturday we did the Springville Stakes 5k Run and not be weary.  we had a lot of fun.

 Adam loved the umbrella

 Kyle was content to chill in the stroller the whole time

Black Berries

I think the pictures tell this story just fine.

Fun at Chuck E Cheese's

As a family we have found that we do really well with motivation if we have some incentive.  So as incentive for one of our family goals (daily Scripture study) we had a reward of a trip to Chuck E Cheese's.  Adam was super excited and we had a ton of fun. 

 Kyle was a Cheese head

 Adam earned a lot of tickets and was really happy to get this "star"

 Adam and Kyle had fun riding a lot of the cars together.

Adams own token, he was a pro at putting them in the slots.  

If we reach our reading goal next time, we are going on a  camping trip!

we love babies!

Didn't really have any creative way to announce this, though we did tell people on April fools day.  We are expecting! baby Cook # 3 is due by the end of November and we couldn't be happier.  Last time it took a little while to get Kyle so we are happy that we didn't have to play the waiting game with this one.  I am excited to have a winter baby too, having the boys both born in July,this will be a new experience.  I am still nursing Kyle and as a result I haven't had any morning sickness, soon enough though he will have to be weaned and I just hope I am far enough along when that happens.

Easter Saturday

On the day before Easter Sunday we have a nice celebration. This keeps Easter Sunday pretty reverent and special.  We color eggs Friday night and have an Easter egg hunt.  We hide one golden egg that is the most special... it is empty.  This reminds us that on Easter morning the tomb holding the saviors body was likewise empty.   Both Saturday and Sunday were very special days for us.

1. Kyle trying out Adam's "car"

2. we don't get a news paper so I used a phone book... best use we can get out of it!

3. Adam really didn't want to get his hands dirty, what a silly boy.

4. Kyle didn't mind at all... he even tried to drink the dye

5. the boys baskets and their new outfits.

6. Kyle is getting good at getting what he wants.

7. tastey

8. success

9. Adams turn

10. Kyle really liked his basket

11. the boys and their bunnies

12. yay for our new bike trailer! the boys loved cruising around behind mama.

We hope you all had a very wonderful Easter 

goings on

The last few weeks have been full of decision making and I thought I'd let you all in on what we've been deciding.  Nathaniel got accepted to the CS masters program at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign which is ranked number 5 in the nation.  Even though we haven't heard back from our last school, Georgia Tech, we have decided to accept Illinois.  The great thing about this is that Illinois's masters program can be taken online, completely, so along with that decisions comes another one.  We are staying in Utah! we have started saving up for a house and hopefully next year we will be able to move out of the place we are renting and we will be staying in a place that will fit a few more kids as least ;) The masters program will take at most five years, so we will be staying at least that long. We have also been making a lot of financial decisions that will help us invest for the future.  I have been playing around with the idea of putting Adam in a neighborhood pre-school this year, and we are going to at least have him in one activity this summer, (I need him to get swimming lessons this year, to ease my mind about taking him to seven peaks).  We have also decided to increase the amount of children we have in the somewhat near future.  More on that decision later.

Picture from when we were dating... just because I wanted to put a picture in but I haven't taken on in the last week. :D

pi

Happy pi day!

boys

gotta love them

eating

 This is Kyle's face when I do not feed him fast enough

Driving

I love these two little boys and watching them learn and play together

Finger Painting

Once a week we have Family Night where we have a short spiritual lesson followed by an activity. This week I really wanted to get both my little boys involved in the activity so I whipped up some edible finger paints ( basically just non toxic) and we had a fun time finger painting.  Adam was pretty fun to watch because he doesn't like slimy or sticky textures on his hands. Kyle had a blast.

 His tray was his canvas 

 Daddy made a beautiful ocean picture

 mommy made a tree and flowers

 and Adam just tried not to make a mess!

daddy showed him how it was done, Adam looked so disgusted :)

Family

My baby brother Darren came home honorably from his two year mission to Paraguay for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day saints. He came home a man that I am proud to call my brother. All my siblings were able to make it for the weekend and because we are rarely ALL in the same place together, we took family pictures

 My dad and brothers

 sisters, I love these girls!

 I think I have the best family ever!

yes we took family pictures in the middle of a snow storm, and we sure had a fun time with it (although it was a little chilly :)

I'm so happy to have you home Darren and so happy we were all able to be there!

Dads Birthday

Happy Birthday to my main man! I love you!

Adam was trying to get your Butterfinger. 

Other Gifts included Spot it and Pandemic as well as a new pillow and accessories to your Raspberry pi. Hope this year is wonderful. Happy 26th Birthday!